An employee of an Essex-based care organisation, that supports adults with autism and learning disabilities, is sharing how she is helping her autistic son expand his horizons in support of World Autism Acceptance week (27 March to 2 April).
For many of us who have loved ones with autism and/or learning disabilities, one of the constant challenges is introducing them to new experiences.
People with autism spectrum disorder (ASD) can find it difficult to cope with a change in routine, but like all of us, an autistic person will benefit from developing new skills.
Trying new things improves confidence and provides a greater sense of wellbeing but upsetting the status quo can be terrifying for families of people with ASD, making them question if it will be too stressful for their loved one, and do more harm than good.
Amanda Bradfield, ECL Marketing Consultant is the mother of 19-year-old Lynden, who has autism and severe learning disabilities.
Amanda recently made the brave decision to take Lynden on the trip of a lifetime to New York as a way of helping Lynden expand his horizons.
Amanda’s story is one that will resonate with many parents of people with learning disabilities and/or autism. In celebration of World Autism Acceptance Week, she hopes that sharing the story of their trip will help them feel more confident about taking on new challenges (big or small) with their autistic loved one.
She also believes that supporting autistic people to participate in ‘normal’ activities within the larger community will help to get them the understanding and acceptance they deserve.
Amanda said: “Since Lynden left full-time education I felt that his world was getting smaller. While we’d successfully navigated the dreaded ‘transition’ period (when he became an adult and left school), he seemed to have retreated further into his comfortable bubble of interacting only with his beloved technology. I noticed that he began to reject some of the community-based activities that he’d always loved and it made me wonder if we’d reached the limit of his development.
“Our saving grace was a long-promised trip to New York. Lynden has often talked about New York as it features in so many of his favourite films. He was desperate to see the Statue of Liberty, the Empire State Building, and a ‘yellow car’! I booked to take him for his 18th birthday back in June 2020, but the Covid lockdown scuppered that, and then the second attempt to take him in July this year was thwarted when I went down with Covid two days before departure. I had been TERRIFIED about taking him to New York since the original booking date in 2020 and it would have been easy to accept that karma had intervened, and it just wasn’t meant to be. But I had this nagging feeling that we had to give it a go for Lynden’s sake, and I’d never forgive myself if I chickened out, so we re-booked for December 2022.
“Those less familiar with autism may be questioning what it was it that frightened me. And those of you with personal experience, will know that the long flight was a significant concern! Lynden had flown before, but not since before the coronavirus pandemic, and only for a maximum of four hours. I knew that once those doors were locked, we would be stuck in a giant metal tube for eight hours with no escape if Lynden had a meltdown. Then there were all the questions about whether he would cope with the noise and crowds of Manhattan, the five-hour time difference, unfamiliar food and drink, and the massive change in his surroundings and routine. But his motivation to see the stature of liberty, meticulous planning, obtaining airline assistance to get us through the airport, noise cancelling headphones and Lynden’s treasured tech greatly improved our chance of success!
“While it is true that autistic people can find change stressful, it is unexpected change that tends to pose the biggest challenge. I kept Lynden in the loop with the itinerary and used google images to show him what we’d be doing each day, which eased any uncertainty and anxiety about what was coming next. Some may also find that picture timetables work well for them.
“Was it worth all the planning? Absolutely! The trip was an unmitigated success; every time I looked at Lynden, he was beaming. Not only did he love the experience, but it pushed so many boundaries. He coped amazingly with everything I’d feared; he ate new foods, drank new drinks, and travelled on planes, trains, automobiles, and boats. He coped with the madness of Manhattan and dared to scale the tallest landmarks, despite his fear of heights.
“Most importantly of all, he looked up from his technology! His eyes were glued to the NYC skyline and permanently scouring for his beloved Empire State Building. On seeing the Statue of Liberty, he pointed at it and told us what it was, which may seem unworthy of comment, but people with autism don’t always point out or share interest, so for us, it was huge.
“Since returning from New York I’ve noticed that the trip has made us more determined to try new things at home too. We are not so hung up on ensuring specific types and brands of food and drink are available, and Lynden is more amenable to alternatives. He is also more accepting of busy, noisy environments without instantly reaching for his ear defenders. Plus I am continuing to encourage him to participate in pursuits that don’t involve technology!
“I really hope that sharing our experience and the techniques we used to make it a success will also help others smash those boundaries.”
